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Civil & Commercial Mediator

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Interpersonal, facilative, transformative Mediation

It is common to have to travel to a centre or offices to participate in a mediation.  Participants are not always geographically near each other.  If they are to be in the same vicinity, it is by far the best for everyone to be away from their usual environments and share a neutral space in which the process of mediation can have the best possible chances of success.  It is important that space lets every person feel as comfortable and relaxed as possible.  It can take a lot of courage, when emotions and stress have been running high, to agree to a mediation and this is acknowledged by us.  A true mediation does not involve lawyers or legal representation, nor is it an arbitration where there may be a ruling.  It can be a difficult concept to appreciate that the forum is not a courtlike setting to win or lose, or present a case that trumps another's.  It is where everyone gets to be heard, uninterrupted.  No arguments need to be presented or cross examined, everyone is valid and each voice equal.  Each has the same amount of time and space.  You have all agreed to be there in the hopes of settling what is usually a difficult situation.  You choose the length of mediation you may need.  It may be two hours, it may be two days. It is also a safe space for thoughts and feelings to be heard.  As the saying goes, what happened in Spain, stays in Spain.  No notes or recordings may be kept.

 

There will be many conflicting emotions when preparing to deal with something that has become difficult and often stressful for all concerned. Often travelling itself, when you are already full of various emotions and going to somewhere new, can be a stress some could do without.  There are options to deal with this.  One of them is to not to incur costs for venue, time and travel and to opt to have a zoom meeting, which does work surprisingly well.  As it is effectively face to face, usually everyone can easily see past the screens and will communicate as though they were all in the room together.  Individuals can feel safe and unthreatened whilst they remain in their own space during what can sometimes be a difficult process.  So far the statistics for success with this have been good.  However, if one of the aims is to faciliate progress or repair of relationships, or it is important for other reasons that participants communicate in person, then participants may feel it is better to all be in the same room.  You may opt for a combination of both.  The choice is entirely yours.  The mediation is yours also.  If you feel you need to take a break and obtain refreshments from the kitchen, step outside, or break out from the group for a breather, there are seperate spaces available to enable you to do so.  You do not need to feel entrapped within the room and process.

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When mediation is suggested to protect the family relationships.   Sometimes it can be that difficult family decisions need to be made about elderly parents, serious illness, disabilities or accidents, or terminally ill family members.  Maybe the ill or elderly person is asking for the mediation knowing how difficult it is for the family to deal with and wishes for a decision to be reached that does not put the burden on one member of the family.  Maybe a health power of attorney and living will is agreed also giving everyone an equal say in the matter.  Maybe from the mediation a set of tasks is agreed and once done, a follow up mediation meet (whether by zoom or face to face) is agreed to finalise.  It is your mediation and you can direct what it is that you would like to be achieved.

 

For those meetings that need to be in person, we provide a setting in attractive and peaceful surroundings in the South of the Isle of Wight.  This means it is an entirely neutral and peaceful environment for everyone.  It gives all participants the kind of space that is not clinical or corporate, and is informal, quiet and calm, near to cafes, a fine Inn and another two Inns nearby overlooking the sea.  We hope therefore, it provides the best possible facility to achieve a good mediation experience and a positive outcome.  The venue is selected for its relaxed environment, with separate rooms and spaces for people to break out away from each other as needed, as well as provide the home comforts of kitchen facilities for refreshments.  It is also a very cost effective facility for our clients.  The venue is subject to availability.  If it is not available on the desired date, an alternative similar venue may be sourced if desired (subject to availability and cost). 

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You can opt to make this a day trip or an overnight trip.  This may depend on the length of your mediation. There are a number of places for overnight stays close by but of course the whole island is easily accessible.   It would be quite understandable that you wish to make the best  of the mediation experience and allow yourself "wind down" time before or afterward and the surroundings certainly allow for that.    Sometimes a mediation can facilitate more than a resolution and can help toward the healing of fractured and damaged relationships or upsetting situations needing some form of closure.  Whatever it is you hope to achieve from your mediation, we hope our centre can support you in this.

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Having committed to the intention to participate in a mediation, you are already showing that you have agreed to try for a resolution. In recognition of your commitment, and to facilitate the journey to the Isle of Wight Mediation Centre, we offer a deal to both sets of particpants of a refund in ferry costs per party if you are travelling by car, to a maximum of £200.  This deal is available where a party's mediation fees are £1,000 or more.  To clarify, this deal is not per person, it is per each of the two parties and where each party's fees exceed £1,000.  For example, two or more people in a party at a 6 or 8hr / mediation would comfortably qualify for the ferry refund upon receipt of your charges.  We do hope this encourages you to use our Centre and this contributes to providing you with a good mediation experience.

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It is possible to travel directly to the island via train, from London to Shanklin for example, and the crossing is included in the price of a train  ticket and is often a cost effective method of travel to the island.  Parking on the mainland and using foot passenger fares on the ferries or hovercraft at either Southampton or Portsmouth are also usually cost effective throughout the year and your chosen accommodation may also include or advise on transfers across the island for you. There are a number of car hire places on the island and a good bus service.  Please discuss your intentions with us if you wish.

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Our Mediation Centre can be used for in person or zoom mediation

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Where mediation fees are lower than £1000 per party, and you wish to retain use of your car, you may nonetheless find it effective in terms of both costs and obtaining a resolution, to use our centre on the Isle of Wight or its zoom service.  As with most independent mediators we believe in its power to resolve.  This peaceful and calm environment, and neutral venue gives you excellent chances of an improved mediation experience with a good outcome.  Our centre supports both in person or face to face zoom mediations, so please consult us about organising according to your wishes.  Please visit our costs page to get a better understanding of our costs structure.

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Mediators are trained not to be specialists

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Whilst it may be useful for a Mediator to be familiar with the environment or subject matter requiring a mediation, so that it may help the Mediator create open questions toward a resolution, at the very same time it may also not be.  The Mediator is trained to ask open, neutral questions without bringing any personal bias.   This applies to all situations and so understanding very little of the subject can be a huge benefit so as to avoid steering the Mediation.  No matter how unintentional, bias is within a person as it bores deep into our values.  For these reasons a Mediator will undergo a debrief after each mediation to look at the undoubted challenge on values, sympathies, morals and the wide range of factors that make us into who we are.  It is a constant pathway of self evaluation and growth that is necessary to be the best Mediator for you.  As such, a Mediator's skill set is designed to encompass all types of mediation, in all types of arenas. 

 

Each Mediator will find the areas they prefer to work in and become familiar with as they find their abilities, empathies and talents fit well into certain areas and conversely there will be certain areas an individual may prefer not to work in.  Participants will find it of value to have a mediator who is relaxed, confident and empathetic whilst clearly remaining neutral and focussed.  It helps build rapport and trust.  A mediator will work to give each participant an equal voice, to have their experiences heard and addressed and attempt to faciliate movement and breakthroughs in what can seemingly be intractable situations.  It is important to the Mediator that the Mediation experience provides not only steps toward resolution, but also the possibility of closure and healing and allows the participants to walk away feeling better and different to when they came in.  Whilst this process can be challenging for a whole host of reasons and fraught with a variety of emotions we hope that you can trust us with the process and structure that is used to handle that, and accept the assurances that we do not give any participant additional power or influence.  That is not how it works. We remain independent, neutral and confidential.

 

Our experience and preferences transfer into a number of areas.  Our training covered a number of subjects such as employment problems, disputes and claims, hospital/negligence conflict and claims, contract disputes, community disputes, workplace conflict, inheritance disputes.  Please do contact us to see if we can help.

Travel Deal  Refund in ferry fees up to a value of £200

Be in control.  Be Certain

Trained by and Member of both Society of Wills Writers and Estate Planners & Society of  Mediators

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