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Right to Stay and Die at Home Planning

Within your planning, you may like to consider the Right to Stay and Die at Home planning.

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There may be a variety of scenarios.  You may wish to prepare for the end on your terms or you may not be ill, but wishing to prepare for the possible event. You may prepare a Living Will, sometimes known as an Advance Directive, with an Advance Statement that usually goes with it.  Your Will usually has a your Letter of Wishes which can detail various things such as funeral details or why you have chosen to exclude a certain beneficiary.  In this we can alsol detail your wish to die at home and ensure we have covered certain eventualities and identify what it is that is important to you.  You may be considering sharing this discussion with others for a number of reasons and can make an appointment with us to help with that also.  For more information and explanation on Living Wills please see Serious and Terminal Illness Planning

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An Advance Statement is usually included with a Living Will / Advance Directive.  If you prepare a Living Will with us then an Advance Statement will be included in the price.  We consider it important the two are together.

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We will consider use of the Letter of Wishes which often accompanies a Will as you may also include other details such as your funeral arrangements and you may be as brief or detailed as you wish.  This can always be updated with further detail in the event of a serious illness or change of circumstances.  Otherwise, you are now prepared in the event of unforseen circumstances and can move forward to living your best life..

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All plans and documents can be as confidential as you wish even where there are discussions that include other people, members of your family or caregivers.  You are welcome to invite others to share this planning process such as someone you care about, a person who cares about you, or family or caregivers.  People's lives are often complicated, sometimes unique, and we recognise that.  No-one is excluded.

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If you have been diagnosed with a serious illness you may wish to prepare.  This also may bring with it a number of unresolved practical issues that you would like to have addressed.   It may involve discussions with your carers regarding care and treatment before it can be recorded in documentation.  You will reach agreement as to what can, and maybe cannot, be done.  We will guide you as to what it is you need to do, who you need to speak to and how to put in place a plan.  Once your Right to Stay and Die at Home plan is recorded you can be sure everything possible has been done to carry out your wishes.  If you have created an Advanced Care Plan it can be stored in there along side your Living Will if you like.  You may have a lot more control and power than you imagine by doing this.  We will help advise and guide you all the way.

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In addition, as our service promises, we try to cover all the bases.  If you are finding it particularly difficult to reach agreement for your wishes to be reached, then you may wish to consider a mediation session.  The process can be highly successful.

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Whilst we are looking at the Living Will and Advance Statement we can consider whether you require any Powers of Attorney.  Please see Serious & Terminal Illness Planning for more information on this.  We will consider whether you wish to include Isobel's Conditions.  These conditions were devised as a result of Isobel's true story.  It is an additional measure to guide a Power of Attorney as to your wishes in order to protect you and them.

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Of course within this process you may review or create a Will.  We will consider your position in a wholelife way.  This will include whether there are minors, people or property you wish to protect and also the consequences on any beneficiaries, for example whether you have made gifts within the last 7 or 14 years and whether any beneficiaries are minors or parents.  When you are satisfied you have covered all eventualities, we can prepare your Will and the accompanying documents. 

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Note:  Please please please do not change or create a Will in favour of anyone who has to persuade you to do so and/or comes into your later life suddenly until you have discussed it with someone else you trust such as ourselves, or your GP.  If you don't know who to talk to, call Age UK Befriending Service    https://www.ageuk.org.uk/services/befriending-services/  to stay safe and combat loneliness.  Then discuss your wishes only with an experienced accredited person who has been recommended beforehand.  The Society of Will Writers or Law Society can help.  There are too many exploitation stories to not make this plea.  Whilst we must absolutely make a Will according to your wishes, any professional should record on file if there is any appearance of duress or persuasion. 

So pick your Will making professionals carefully. 

Only use someone who has been recommended independently to you

Think twice before changing your Will in favour of someone different in later life, even if its family.

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"This planning process is designed to help you think about things you otherwise may not and provide a safe space to explore concerns and options.  What it aims to achieve is to find out what is really important to you, and others if you wish, and how we can act on that in a practical way.  If, for example, you have expressed the wish to die at home but it is not possible at the end, then what is important to you has been discussed, recorded and put in place.  Assurances, precious possessions, people and plans are included.  We also aim to reduce the common experience of regrets and guilt by facilitating discussion and sharing concerns alongside creating plans and documents, all with the aim of giving you peace of mind to focus on what is important, living your best life now in any way you choose.  Do you have a dream of how or where you would like to be?  Would you like to share that? 

 

Talking about these things with someone you love can be tough to face, but consider this, end of life planning does not mean end of options and end of living, it aims to be there to free you up to live your best life. 

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It is designed to have you think about what you and maybe those closest will do near the end of your life.  You may express the wish to be at home at the end, but what if you cannot?  Is Home where the Heart is?  Is "Home" not a physical place but any space if it is with your family or someone you care about or a precious item?  What plan would you like to consider if that is the case?  If End of Life Care becomes a Hospice, is being surrounded by people you love what is really important?  Would taking you out of the hospital environment be really important?  Would not feeling alone be really important? Would being a burden on your family be a real worry?  Is there a special request?  "Please take me down to sit by the sea for as long as possible when I am near the end"  How can that special request be achieved?  Think about it, think about how you can make your life its best to the end.

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We provide the rare opportunity to talk to each other in a completely safe environment about concerns, wishes, worries and how you would like things to happen if possible?  What practical steps can be done to achieve your wishes or ones that would be acceptable if your best plan cannot happen?

 

What we would like to explore here, is this, "What is really important to you? "

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This kind of subject rarely gets discussed and explored.  You are not heard nor are the loving caring people around you, nor do you hear each other.  As such people are left with enormous regrets and guilt.  Too many "if onlys ....".  Maybe that is your wish:  to communicate your thoughts and feelings.  If you wish it, we aim to provide the space that enables communication and practical discussions surrounding a subject that all too often gets left to responding at the last minute where choices can no longer be made.

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Book an hour (more if you would like) on your own or with whoever you like.  You can come prepared if you like with things you would like to say or suggest or come and let the process unfold.  At the end of this process you may have said and discussed things, made plans and documents and walk away feeling you made progress either for yourself or with others you care about. I can provide sensitive experienced guidance in a safe format, whether in person or on zoom, it works.  If you want to discuss your needs, please call."

Many people do not know you have a right to say where you would like your end of life care to be.  So, for your information we include a link on End of Life Care with the NHS so you can see what the NHS say :

​https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/end-of-life-care/what-it-involves-and-when-it-starts/

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As is identified in the video by Melita's husband, what is truly important is that it is identified what is important to you and what your wishes actually are.

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The NHS say " You have the right to express your wishes about where you would like to receive care and where you want to die. You can receive end of life care at home, in a care home, hospice or be cared for in hospital, depending on your needs and preference.

People who are approaching the end of their life are entitled to high-quality care, wherever they're being cared for.  "

Right to Die at Home and the NHS

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A terminally ill man won his fight to die at home after a health authority in Wales had refused to provide care at home.  They finally agreed to fund his nursing care at home.  However, a solicitor had to be hired to fight for it.  The case was to be heard in the High Court in London but the hearing did not have to go ahead.  The health authority agreed before the court hearing took place.  There can be hurdles to achieving your wishes.  Hopefully you wont have to go this far but if you do need to challenge a decision to refuse care at home, we can provide an experienced solicitor who can advocate the right for you die at home.  If you are encountering problems, please contact us.

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Many people do not know that there is a right to die at home and feel they have to go along with what is easier for the hositals to organise.  The NHS does provide good information in how you can organise hospice care and end of life care so hopefully it will not be a challenge.

Be in control.  Be Certain

Trained by and Member of both Society of Wills Writers and Estate Planners & Society of  Mediators

Supports living your best life

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